An infusion of familiarity into my alienness.
A
warm smile, a gentle caress.
That will do.
That is what I need.
I
am willing to admit it now.
Now that I have seen what the years
can do to a man like me.
I
am willing to beg now.
Willing to fall on my knees.
On all four if
necessary,
with
my head stuck in the sand,
dust filling my mouth
and death nearer to me
than my own veins.
I
am willing to do all this now.
I
am willing to shout,
willing to listen,
willing to burst in tears.
Now that I
have seen what the years can do to a man like me.
Now I am willing to live.
Now I am willing to pay heed to my desire,
to my need,
to my yearning
to live,
to love,
to be loved.
February 24, 1997